My Crazy Week

This week has been so NUTS! We have had something going almost every single night which makes this lady super tired!
















Last Wednesday was my brother-in-law Hunter's graduation. I was really excited that we could go support him and we even had awesome seats! They had chairs set up behind the graduates facing the stage and we had front row! (Spencer's mom won them in a silent auction or something, it was like VIP treatment!) That was super long and boring, as all graduations are, but we now have another high school grad in our midst! Congratulations Hunter!

Thursday: Hunter and his cousin Logan (who also graduated) had a party for all of their friends. I officially feel super old after going to that party. We mostly were there to be the secret-under-cover chaperones but I definitely felt my youth slipping away as all of these newly graduated seniors hung out together.
*On a side note: I remember feeling so mature when I graduated. I felt like I was an adult and that I was so much cooler than all of the kids younger than me. I know realize that I was still just as immature as they were! And NOW I am probably still super immature....I don't feel like it though :)*
That night was really chill but it was still a party!

Friday: Our first of 2 nights playing babysitter at my mom's. Her and my dad decided to go on a last minute cruise and somehow talked me into staying at their house! ;) It actually went really well that night. I brought over ice cream sandwiches and a movie that most of them hadn't seen and we all just sorta chilled.

Saturday: that morning we made breakfast burritos (with mashed up tater tots because there were no hash browns) and hung out until we decided to go to the pool. We had to wait in line for a little over 40 minutes before we got let in and we were up pretty close to the front. SO glad we left when we did. We swam and let me tell you...swimming+pregnant body=happiness. It felt so good to be in the water for 1. because it was hot outside and 2. because it takes all pressure off your back. I might need to get an indoor pool for my living room so I can just sit in it all day. After swimming, Spencer and I got to take the night off and spend some time with his best friend and his fiance and another couple playing games. His friend lives in Utah right now going to school but he happened to be in town helping his family move and wanted to see us (I know, we are so popular!). We played a game called Telestrations which I HIGHLY recommend to any group over the size of 6. It is a mix between pictionary and telephone. SO FUN. We also played catch phrase which is always a good time. We played boys vs girls and let me tell you...the boys had a really hard time staying calm. We spent most of the time laughing at them and their insane behavior. Poor Celeste (the fiance) got hit in the face 4 times by her man because he was flailing his arms around like a mad man. She eventually made him move to the other end of the couch! We had so much fun and are so excited for them to get married next month! That night we went back to my mom's and spent the night.

Sunday: we took the kids to church and then took a nap. Spencer's cousin Logan got his mission call Friday morning and they planned for him to open it Sunday night at 7:30. After I woke up from my nap, I went out to get an ice cream sandwich (from Friday) and came to the knowledge that the children had decided they were just there to eat whenever they wanted. I didn't even get one. That's when we left. I figured they would be better off without my raging hormones any longer. We went to the Hon's and stayed there until the mission call opening. We are so proud of Logan and his choice to serve a mission! He has been called to serve in Ecuador speaking Spanish! That night, Hunter and Hayden came home with us to spend the night and spend Memorial Day with us (since Spencer didn't have to work). They turned on a movie but I was pooped so I went to bed.

Monday: We got up and ate cinnamon rolls (because my husband rocks) and played Just Dance! For your entertainment, follow this link. Good times :). We went swimming and then had lunch. It was a super fun day with the boys and Spencer was so excited to spend some quality time with them. We had a family graduation party last night so we took the boys over to Grandma's and started yet another night of festivities. We had some really yummy pulled pork and other delicious food. I ate. A lot. I also learned something new: If you eat a lot, it makes your back hurt. I got so full, apparently, that my body couldn't even handle it. I felt so awful! I just sat on the couch and tried not to move! It really was a fun night with family though and then I fell asleep on the couch while we were watching the video of Hunter's life in pictures. Apparently I slept through opening presents, the guys watching a Diamond Backs game, and kids running and screaming everywhere. I'm telling you, this week wore me out! We had to stop by my mom's house to get my wedding ring (oh yeah...we almost lost my wedding ring on Sunday. It fell out of Spencer's pocket as we were getting in the car to leave my mom's house. Luckily I remembered that I didn't have it and we were able to send a child on a search mission. We found it :) ). I fell asleep when we got home and didn't wake up until morning.

Hopefully this week will be a little bit more calm, but let's face it...it probably won't! Good thing I have my amazing husband to take care of me and time during the day to nap. I thank my Heavenly Father for those two things every day :).

Sometimes Everything Hurts

I'm going to try and not make this a negative post, but it's true! Sometimes, everything in your whole body hurts! Being pregnant takes a HUGE toll on your body and sometimes your body just has to have a day or two where it screams and yells and throws a temper tantrum before it settles back down and decides that it can finish what it started. Sunday was that day for me. Saturday night I fell asleep at 8 pm. That's right folks, I am officially one of those people. I never thought I would be back to my childhood bedtime but let's face it....I need my sleep! (this is where you can think to yourself "just wait!" or "enjoy it while you can!"....I understand). I slept until 8 am which is a huge deal because ever since we moved into the new house, I have not been able to sleep past about 7:15. I felt sort of sick that morning, just couldn't get going all the way. During church is when it got really bad and I started feeling it...everywhere. My back, my belly, and everywhere in between. Leaving church I just wanted to go home and take a nap. (Also a lame pregnancy side effect...you are tired at like 2:00 in the afternoon and need sleep!) When we got home, we ate lunch and Spencer found out that his home teaching companion just got out of the hospital so he needed a temporary one...ME! I was actually excited to go with him. We walked over (they live in our complex) and were there for over an hour. The couple we talked to is really nice and I'm excited to have made a new friend. They have one little boy and are barely older than us. That took up my nap time. When we got home, it was time to leave for Spencer's parent's house for dinner and Seminary Graduation for his little brother. I was so tired and hurting that I just laid on the ground for a while. When I tried to get up, I was in so much pain I just had to sit there for a minute and wait for everything to readjust so I could move. We got to dinner and ate really quickly so we could leave. Seminary graduation, while wonderful, might need to stop happening. It took over an hour and a half and there were not even desserts afterwards. I sat there pretty much dying the entire time trying to find a comfortable way to sit to relieve my aches and pains. When it was finally over, we went home and I fell asleep. It was a really rough day and all day I just kept thinking to myself, 'I know she is worth it, but right now it really doesn't feel like it!'. I know. I'm a terrible mother to be. But there are some things that people don't tell you about having a baby! I was not expecting to be in pain so much. I mean I guess I sort of did, but I have been really lucky so far to not have that problem so now that it's happening I am not very tolerant. I'm trying to be. Luckily for me I have my sweet husband who will rub my back or my feet, help me up when I'm hurting, and make sure that I am as comfortable as I can be. I am so grateful for him and all of his sacrifices. He is SERIOUSLY the best.

Monday was better. I woke up in not so much pain and was able to go watch my cousins for the day without any serious pain. Hopefully it stays that way! After such a rough day, it's hard to want to stay pregnant, especially when you don't know how long the pain is going to last...then I figured something out. I DO want to stay pregnant. I want this baby more than anything else in the world. I scrapbooked her ultrasound pictures yesterday and by the end of the day, I was filled with so much love for her that I couldn't even be mad about how badly my body hurt the day before. SHE was all that mattered. SHE is what is making this all worth while. SHE is worth every ache and pain my body can throw at me, and SHE is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love my sweet baby girl and I really can't wait to meet her!

I know...she already has too many clothes!

And tons of bows!

Looking at all of this baby stuff around her room and around our house, I get really really really excited!

Also, I finally took pictures that go with this post!

My grandma and I painted those canvas on the wall! Don't they match  amazingly well??? We did good!

Finally got my living room put together the way I like it :) And it only took 3 months!

My fork and spoon I got on sale! I really like them

OUR VERY OWN WASHER AND DRYER. They are being used as I type! :)

Big changes :)

Actually, these changes aren't that big, but to me they feel HUGE!! I am so excited for them!

-SPENCER IS DONE WITH SCHOOL FOR THE SEMESTER!!!!!
I am seriously so excited. The last week of his school was really hard for me. Call me a wimp but I need my husband time and that week, I got absolutely none. I have hated one of his classes from the get go. It is an online physics class and his teacher was a little wacky. The worst part though is that his teacher made everything due on Sundays and half the time wouldn't put up everything they needed to complete the work until Saturday morning!! How unfair is that?! So for the last 15 weeks every Sunday has been filled with Spencer sitting doing homework the entire day while I sit and try to keep myself busy. I hated it so much! I do a lot better if he is actually away at school because then I know he is gone and will be back! When he is at home doing homework, I never know how long it is going to take, and I can't talk to him. He is sitting there right next to me and I have to try to pretend he isn't there. It was AWFUL. At the same time, it was nice to have him home. So I am very glad that the semester is over. I have at least a couple of weeks before he starts another semester (summer school.....yippee...) and we have gotten to spend a lot more time together. During that week of studying for finals I got really emotional and lonely. I would try to leave or do something with my Grandma so I wasn't just sitting there every  night being sad, but it was really really hard. By the end of the week, I was so just done that I broke down. Poor Spencer didn't even know why, he just came home and I was crying and then I cried myself to sleep. Poor guy. But now it's done and over :).

-Mother's Day was so much fun!
I have the sweetest husband in the world. I honestly do. Mother's Day morning I woke up to chocolate chip waffles and chocolate milk. He even made them all cute and had a bowl of powdered sugar and a scoop of butter on the plate. It was so cute :). The funniest part about this morning is that the night before I had talked about making cupcakes for our class as a reward for doing the little thing I sent home with them. I thought as I rolled over one time that Spencer was out there making the cupcakes. I started thinking about it and this was my thought process...
"....is he making the cupcakes?...."
"...he's probably going to make the mini cupcakes since that is all he has ever seen me make...."
"...I was going to make big cupcakes...."
"...oh well, I guess I should be grateful that he is making them for me..."
"...how many mini cupcakes do I give each girl?..."
And this is when I feel back asleep! It was a wonderful surprise to wake up to breakfast instead (I totally wasn't expecting it!) and still got to make the big cupcakes for the class!
I got a chocolate bar at church for being a mother (any girl over he age of 18) and I got chocolate covered strawberries at family dinner because I am a mother (for real this time). I also got to spend time with both of my amazing mothers and we Skyped Spencer's brother Preston who is on a mission in Mexico and coming home next month! Crazy!

-Washer and Dryer!
That's right folks, you heard it here first!! We finally have a washer and dryer! Well, we will in about an hour! My dad is picking them up and installing them this morning! This is one of the most amazing changes that we are experiencing. Since we have been married (14 months) we have not had a washer and dryer. We usually take our laundry over to Grandma's house and spend and entire day/night over there using hers. We love going over there and spending time with her, but since I have been getting a bigger belly and having to usually load up, wash, and reload up the laundry to haul it from here to there, it has been getting really difficult. We have had two different occasions where we thought we were getting them and it hasn't gone through so I was beginning to think it was never actually going to happen. Then, just Thursday I believe, my mom tags me in a post on Higley Friends alerting me of a woman selling hers for $400. I told her YES YES YES. We will take them. The lady responded and told me that she had a friend respond on her personal page first so she would get back to me by the end of the day if that was going to work. Well, I was pretty sure it wasn't going to work so I got all bummed again. I commented again that night just to see and she said they were MINE!! Such a happy day! I can't wait to wash our first load of laundry in our own apartment. I think having them will make this place seem even more like a home than it already does!!!

-New Decorations
Grandma and I took on a project a couple of weeks ago, and it turned out awesome! In my living room I have this really big brown wall. There is NOTHING on it. It looked really boring. I had been trying to figure out what to put there since we moved in and just haven't been able to find anything! Grandma came up with the idea that we should paint canvas to match the living room and hang them up on the wall. After lots of changing our ideas, two FULL days of working on them, and the moment when we had to make the first official mark of paint, we ended up with the coolest decorations in my whole house. It totally brought the whole room together and I absolutely LOVE them!!!! I also found the perfect fork and spoon pictures for my kitchen wall that I had been wanting and also ON SALE. Doesn't get much better than that. (pictures coming soon!)

-Baby Girl Hon
The other person that has been making a lot of changes is our sweet baby girl! She is getting so big and so forceful in my tummy. She is causing some aches and pains but mainly we just love her to bits! I am finally in my third trimester and start going to the doctor every two weeks now. I have had two ultrasounds in the past two weeks, one at a college that a friend of mine did, and another at my actual doctor's office for a growth ultrasound. I have loved looking at this little girl so much lately. It's fun to actually be able to see what she is doing in there! At my ultrasound on Thursday we got lots of good pictures and I learned that she weighs 2 lb 9 oz. In just about 6 oz and about another inch, she will be as big as my baby cousin Ezra was when he was born. That's crazy!!! I love her so much though and I am really just ready, especially after getting a 3D shot of her face, to hold her and love her and take care of her.

Baby girl's Nose and lips :)

The little white fuzzy stuff on the left of her head is hair :) Already sprouting! No wonder I have had such terrible heartburn!

The left of the picture is her head, the right thing is her foot and toes. She is curled up in a tiny little ball!

Baby's foot. Look how cute and tiny it is!

Our life has tons of fun changes happening right now. Even if they seem small or insignificant, it is making me really really excited! I love my life right now and I could not ask for better support, more loving family, a better husband, or anything else. I am happy and waiting to see what else is just around the corner!

100 days!

It has been WAY too long since I blogged and I feel like with how fast all of this baby stuff is coming and going I should be documenting it in some way so later when I look back on my pregnancy, I remember how things actually were and not just the way that my brain with romanticize it (which is usually what happens).

So first of all. I am so excited to have only 100 DAYS LEFT!!! Can you even believe how fast this is going. I am almost in my third trimester and I am 26 weeks ish (technically not until Wednesday but every time she has been measuring a few days ahead so in my brain, my weeks start on Monday). My belly is growing like crazy and I am starting to feel the aches and pains of pregnancy. My back hurts...a LOT! Even when I lay down, it still just hurts. I don't know if it's the way I am carrying this little bundle of joy or if my body is just not used to carrying this much weight around, I don't know. But still, that is such a tiny thing compared to some of the horror stories I have heard so I am counting my blessings. I also have been eating like a mad woman. I know that is probably bad, but I don't eat a lot at once, I just feel like eating ALL day long... I try to eat some healthy foods, but really, even my healthy foods aren't that healthy. (aka: strawberries, apples, chocolate milk, carrots *with ranch*). Really though, I am pretty proud of the way that my body is handling the weight gain and my new voluptuous figure. I have mostly just gained weight in my tummy (and apparently  a little in my butt according to my mother). I still fit in my shoes, most of my clothes, and am still wearing my wedding ring. I have had a couple of sick days where I just have been....sick. Luckily, I have my amazing husband who will rub my back until I fall asleep when I wake up in the night with a stomach ache or will get me anything I need. He seriously is the best. I don't know what I would do without him. I have had so much more energy lately as well. I just want to be outside, be doing things, be with people, and be more active. This is a very good thing! Except that I don't usually have a car to go do things or people to do them with. This leaves me at home often just wishing that I had somewhere to go. Hopefully once summer starts, some of my friends will be less busy and can hang out with me a little bit more.

The baby is SO ACTIVE. I don't think she ever sleeps!! (except when I am trying to take a video of my stomach moving when she kicks...then she seems to settle down. camera shy? already???). It's starting to get to the point where it doesn't just feel like a little kick anymore...it actually feels like an elbow or a foot or something pushing and moving around inside of me. More than once she will move right on my hand or arm and I actually will pull my arm away because it startles me. I love it....but it grosses me out sometimes Like....there is a human living inside of me, kicking, flipping, punching....and in just 100 days she will be outside of me. It's a lot to take in!!!  I love that she moves so much though. For a long time, I was always so nervous that something was wrong because I wasn't feeling sick anymore but I wasn't feeling her move yet. I just had to hope and pray that everything is ok. Now, I know. I know everything is ok because she lets me know regularly! This is such a blessing and I am so grateful. I have had a couple of people recently who have gotten some really bad news and I am just so grateful that my little baby is ok. My heart and prayers go out to those who have ever had to receive bad news or who have gone through something that no mother should ever have to go through. I hope that I never have to go through that.

On a happier note. I get to go to the doctor on Wednesday! I never thought I would say these words, but I LOVE going to the doctor! I love to hear my baby's heartbeat, to hear that she is growing at the right pace and is right on track, and to know that I am doing fine as well. It is such a bright spot in my month. I look forward to it! I can't wait until/if I get another ultrasound! I have a friend who is in OB school and has offered to give me a free ultrasound at her school if I want to come in! I really want to. The only problem is her hours are very limited and I usually don't have a car. If I do have a car, I am usually busy all afternoon babysitting. I might just have to wait a bit longer. I figured that the best way to show you all (the maybe 4 people that read my blog) how my pregnancy has been going is to just show how quickly my tummy has gotten big.

15 weeks....back when I thought I was getting a belly. HA!

18 weeks

21 weeks. I must have been full that day or something because it seems like it gets smaller into week 22...

22 weeks

23 weeks

24 weeks (This shirt is my favorite pregnancy buy...besides the maternity pants)

25 weeks and only getting bigger!

Thanks for reading this if you do! It's mostly just my journal, but I love letting people know what is going on with my life! People keep asking me if we have a name picked out yet...and we have a couple that are tentative, but we are not setting it in stone until she is born. So far they are Rylee and Reagan. We like them both and can't really fully decide yet.

My favorite comment that people have made so far has been, "Aww, you have a belly!" To which I respond in my brain, "Yep! Always have! Look! You have one too!" hahah
The one I have not loved keeps coming from my 13 year old sister. "You're getting big Chels." I know I'm getting big! And I don't even really feel that self conscious about it, it just bugs me that she says it every time she sees me. One other funny moment. My 18 year old sister was talking to one of her friends and was showing her some of my belly pictures and decided that my belly got big really fast. She shows me the pictures from the yellow shirt to the second blue one and says, "Look! In TWO weeks! It's huge! TWO weeks!!" to which I responded, "Yeah...I know!" It's like she didn't think I noticed that this thing under my boobs has been protruding at an alarming rate! haha I really love being pregnant though and all of these funny comments make it even better :).

 I have two friends that are pregnant too that I hang out with regularly. One is due on May 31. She is 10 weeks minus a day ahead of me. Then there is me. Then there is my other friend who is due in October (I can't remember the exact date) and she is 10 weeks behind me! (She is having her 2nd though). It's fun when we all hang out because we are all going through the same things and all like to talk about it. One friend's husband made a comment at a game night we had last weekend that they should start a reality TV show called "All our wives are pregnant" or something to that effect! It could be a hit don't you think?? :)

Our Date to the Zoo

Call me crazy, call me immature, but I SERIOUSLY love going to the zoo. It is one of my favorite things to do! I have been there so many times and it is always the same animals but I think it is so much fun. In the past few weeks I have really wanted to be outside a lot. I don't feel like sitting on my butt and doing nothing. I have been trying to find someone to go the zoo with me and nobody ever has the time or wants to. Today Spencer and I had nothing planned. We were going to just spend the day together. I made a joke and said, "Let's go to the zoo!" A few minutes later, Spencer says to me, "Ok let's go to the zoo". I said, "You don't want to go to the zoo...." to which he replies, "Yeah, I just looked it up online, let's go!" So we got ready and we went to the zoo!! Oh man, I was so happy all morning while we were getting ready and stuff.....I just kept saying over and over, "WE'RE GOING TO THE ZOO!! WE'RE GOING TO THE ZOO!!" haha

We didn't get to the zoo until about 1:00 in the afternoon which gave us about 4 hours until it closed. I thought that wasn't that much time since every time I have gone with little kids, that time gives you about half of the zoo. Well we got to see EVERYTHING! It was awesome! We could sit down whenever we wanted, we weren't worried about kids needing naps or being grouchy, we could keep walking all we wanted and it was so much fun! I'm glad we got to go together once before we have the baby.

When we were getting to the zoo, we see a sign that says 'ZOO PARKING IS FULL: FREE PARKING AT THE MUNI'. Well. That free parking was almost half a mile away from the zoo. We went over and found a spot and then we decided... 'the parking lot can't be full ALL DAY, let's just go check'. We got to the zoo parking lot and we found a spot less than 10 spaces from the front in the 5th row from the front gate. SCORE! I was so happy. I knew that after a full day of walking at the zoo that I would not want to walk another half mile to the car.

We went and saw all the animals, held hands, and seriously just had the funnest time! We also got to do some things that we had never been able to do before. When either of us has ever gone to the zoo before, there have been lots of other kids with us and stuff so we never got to do all of the extra cool stuff there is to do. Spencer and I decided to feed the giraffes! That was seriously so cool!!! They have the longest tongues and the one that we fed was 15 feet tall and not even full grown yet. We got to take pictures with them and ask lots of questions.

Fun fact: did you know that when a giraffe is born it is 6 ft tall and weighs 150 lbs?? Can you imagine lugging that thing around?? HOLY GUACAMOLE!! Yeah. It was a really really fun thing neither one of us had ever been able to do. We also got to pet stingrays. I had actually done this before but Spencer never had. He loved it! He even got splashed! Apparently even sting rays have a limit for how long they like to be touched!

 Spencer tested that limit...ha. It was a really really fun day and I'm so glad that I got to spend it with my best friend in the whole entire world.

Here are some of the pictures we took. I know it's just animals, but I was pretty proud of how cool of shots I got with barely being able to see what my camera was doing because it was so bright outside!

Spencer found his "bro" or "homie"....he's a little odd.

Spencer said there was a bird behind me so he wanted to get it in the picture too...I don't see a bird...

We loved going in the monkey village!! Spencer had never been in there before! There was a monkey who climbed on a rope right above us, stopped RIGHT over my head...and sneezed on me! Funny monkey!

At one of our breaks. He was making funny faces but then people walked up so he decided to pretend to be normal ;)

This is the giraffe we fed. Her name is Zuri and she is the tallest one at the zoo

Ok. These birds are seriously the funniest birds I have ever seen in my entire life. They just  sit there and groom themselves the entire day!!! They also twist their necks up into an almost knot and then just leave their head back on their back! And you know how most flamingos stand on one leg and tuck the other leg up underneath them? Well THESE ones only tuck half of their leg up under them and the rest of it hangs down right from their butt. Yeah. I was so amused. They were probably my favorite part of the zoo besides the giraffes. We spent at least 20 minutes there just staring at them and laughing :)

Spencer doing the flamingo pose: head on back, foot coming out of butt.

These were the scariest creatures we saw today. They just kept circling their little area, coming really close up to the fence, and just being downright frightening. I would NEVER want to see one of these out of captivity....

Spencer and I came out of this day without so much as a scratch! Not even a sunburn! That's right people...we sunscreened! OH! And we bought our sweet baby girl her first souvenir!

Happy Birthday!!

Today is one of my favorite people's birthday! MY GRANDMA!! 

She is pretty much one of my best friends and I know...that sounds funny. I always have to explain to people when I say I am going to hang out with my grandma or am spending time with my husband at my grandma's house that she's not like most grandmas....she's a COOL grandma!! She has more spunk and life than any  grandma I have ever met! She hangs out with me, shops with me (usually I am ready to go home before she is), eats food with me, does puzzles with me, does yoga with me (well ok....that was only like once), laughs with me, and so much more!! Since I got married and moved closer to her, we have been so much closer. I see her at least once a week if not more! So far this week, I have seen her Today, yesterday, Tuesday, and Monday...so yeah...every day! I am so glad to live so close to her and be able to spend so much time with her. Last night I was thinking about what I should get my awesome grandma for her birthday. I came up with a big fat nothing! What do you get someone that you see so often and that you do stuff with all the time. I ended up with a better idea than a gift. I decided I wanted to heart attack her house. She was out to dinner with her friends last night so Spencer and I made up a TON of hearts and headed over there. We hung them up all over her kitchen, living room, dining room, and even some in her bedroom. It was so fun and I was so excited for her to get home and see it! Why is it that doing stuff for people makes you feel so good??? It was seriously all I could think about until I fell asleep last night, and then again first thing this morning! I love my grandma so much and I don't know what I would do without her. She is pretty much the only person (besides my husband and my sister) that thinks I am as funny as I really am and that will laugh at almost every single one of my jokes! She has amazing fashion sense, can sew amazingly, is ok at puzzles ;), and makes me happy to be alive!!! :) I took pictures of her house with hearts all over but they are on my phone and hard to get onto here...plus not that great of quality. Just imagine paper hearts...everywhere!

This morning she gave me a call and thanked me for the hearts. We ended up going to breakfast (at 10:30) so she could get her free food and then ran to the mall to find me a cute swimsuit. I ended up finding an actual maternity one for as much as a top cost at walmart. THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. It's super cute and I'm really happy to have a comfortable swimsuit. And I even think I will be able to wear it if I'm not pregnant so DOUBLE SCORE!!

Anyways. I just love my grandma to bits! :)